Back to WW

After my last post, I wound up getting an e-mail for a discount on signing up for Weight Watchers with meetings.  All of the ones previously had been for online only, which I wasn't interested in.  I took it as a SIGN and climbed aboard the WW train again!  My partner-in-crime joined me! (Go textie!) and a co-worker did too.  So I'm doing this!  I went to my first meeting last Saturday.  We were going to a movie afterwards, so I went to the 8:30 a.m. meeting and holy crap - there were SO MANY people!  It was really motivating.  Most of the meeting was group discussion...it just seems like there is so much support there. It was great!  As much as sleeping in longer sounds good, I think I'll stick to the 8:30 meetings.  

So weighing in for the first time wasn't too bad. It was where I thought I'd be which was only 1/2 lb more than when I stopped WW last year!  The lady checking me in was impressed.  I told her I've been up a lot higher, but I've come back down - and I'm just really excited to be back.  After the first week, at least for me, you're really excited to weigh in.  It's typically the biggest loss.  I've weighed myself at home and I am down, so definitely looking forward to Saturday.  I know the scale is just a number...blah blah... but it's such a b*tch sometimes!!! 

They do have you set a goal weight - you don't have to do it right away - but they want you to set a long-term goal and then every 4 weeks you set a short-term goal too.  After I weigh on Saturday I'll set my 4 week goal.  Long-term...for now I said 175....no, that won't put me as a lifetime member, and I will still be overweight BUT for now that is my goal.  Once I get there, I'm sure I'll drop it :) And I WILL get there.  

This is going to be another month where I do not reach my dietbet goal.  Steve may though!!  He's close!! He's been doing amazing.  So as it stands now - in order to reach the next dietbet goal (yes....as I keep missing them, it keeps getting harder....UGH) I will need to lose 17.5 lbs by April 30th.  Is it a lot? Yes.  Will I need to work my ass off in order to do it? YES!  Is it possible?  Hell yeah!  Okay....so maybe i'm trying to talk myself into it being possible, but it really is.  Probable?  Not necessarily with my track record, but I'm going to try to start defying the odds.  Getting out of my comfort zone. Doing more. Moving more. Being more. 

The other day Claire had me running, hopping, and jumping down the street as we went for a walk.  She's been really into being active and that makes me so happy. I don't ever want to hinder that. I want her to be fit and healthy and not go through all that I've gone through with being overweight.  I want her to make healthy choices and be proud of herself.  She's growing so fast and makes me so proud!  

So for now, that's all.  I'll post after my next WW meeting.  

xoxo

Katie

Spring is here!

Whether it feels like it or not, spring is here!  And that means..... summer is next!! 

EEEEK!!!  

Uh, wait....wasn't I supposed to be 30 lbs lighter by now?! Well damn.  Thanks to MFP, I can look back to see how much I weighed last time I posted a blog (January 4th -- yes, I'm a slacker) and I'm actually down 5.6 lbs.  So that is a good thing!   From June 8, 2015 - I'm down 21 lbs.  I'm trying to remind myself to be proud of the progress I've made.  It's been a slow journey -- one that's barely started still -- but I need to remind myself that I am capable.  I can do this.  No, I won't be a size 12 by {this} summer ... but one of these summers, I will be.  

The struggle is real.  I fall somewhere between "I want to be sexy AF" and "Cupcakes are healthy muffins after I lick the frosting off, right?"

".  

It's the constant back and forth for me: 

The "I'm-totally-pumped-about-this" that wears off in a day... 

The defeat I feel when I see the jeans that I've never gotten to wear because they haven't fit (even though they're the same size I do wear..... HATE women's clothes sizing!!) .... 

The "It's hard for me to stick to because it is so slow".... 

The "I need to learn to like exercise"... 

The "I didn't think I looked that big until I saw a picture of myself"......

The "I can't wait to be a regular size so I can have cute, sexy clothes".....

The "I'm not near 300 anymore! Yay!"

The "I can lose weight - I've done it...maybe not as much as I'd like, but I can do it!"

There's ups and downs. The roller coaster that goes through my head constantly.  Do I want pizza? Um, yes. That answer is always yes.  Should I never eat pizza again?  No - that would turn me into a miserable person.  Moderation.  Something I still need to learn.  Lucky for me, I've got great support.  Steve, as usual, is awesome.  Pushes me, puts up with me, encourages me, tells me that I'm beautiful...... even when I drive him flipping crazy while being a crazy, emotional, hangry woman.... 

I'm going to try to get my steps in.. going to try adding the random squats while brushing my teeth, or walking in place while doing dishes.... try to add movement to every day activities... the little bits will add up and hopefully I'll see it.  I need to get back to blogging now and then -- not once every few months.  I've got to own my successes and short comings. Push forward and set more obtainable smaller goals, as well as reach for those long-term goals still too!

Where I am today: (well, yesterday) 280.3

Goals:

• Miracle Goal - I don't think it'd be obtained without a 7-day diet and a lotta prayers: 265.4 by 3/31.... This would just let me win this round of the DietBet that I slacked on getting too. I don't expect to reach this one.... but I shall give it my best
• 260 by the end of April
• Fit into those damn jeans that I have in my closet!!

I'll leave my goals at that for now.  If you've read my blog before, you know that I always have many goals.  As I reach them, I'll try to celebrate them here!  I was going to sign up for Weight Watchers with meetings again as I think that's the healthiest WL approaches I've used.  I like the meetings because when you have successes, you get to celebrate with others and they're legitimately proud of you.  Whether you lost .5 lbs, or got your 10 lb ribbon - they make it a big deal.  But I think I'll try to do it on my own for now.  I'll try to turn to the blog to share my successes and work on just being proud of myself.  Feels kinda silly being excited for a 5 lb star sticker, but it was a cool thing for me.  

Okay - enough rambling today.  Cookies* if you read the whole thing!!

xoxo 

Katie

*Cookies are fictional because honestly giving cookies out would be totally counter-productive to my whole goal of finding health....plus I've eaten all the Girl Scout cookies we had, so there's no cookies to give