Taking a quick sec to post

We are two for two with workouts this week, so that is something.  Last night was Cardio Flow - yes.... they moved it to Tuesdays... F that ish.  We wound up doing one of the 2 cardio flows from last phase that we had missed (6 reps instead of 8).  We're going to try to get all the workouts in before the 80 days is up.  Cardio Flow just really bothers me. I know it's a mental thing. But the damn workout doesn't change at all during the 80 days.  At least with the phases the exercises change. This one, they just add more reps of each exercise.  And inchworms are the worst first move for me.  I just hate that this workout actually angers me. Like, how stupid is that that a workout actually makes me mad?  I get pissed off before I even start.  And I wish I was one of those people who were like "Oh, I was so mad and didn't want to do it BUT then I did it and I felt amazing!!!!!!"  Umm... no.  I'm still glad I got it done, but still mad.  Oh well.  So Steve, sorry again for not being able to hide my feelings on that one!  

So we've gotten back to the exercise. That's good!  Now to get my eating in check.  I meal planned and did some prepping so that is good.  It's just the snacking.  There keeps being stuff at work that I can't seem to say no to.  I was so good to start off when we started this 80 DO, but now I'm here and it's longer days..and I'm... just... struggling...  I don't want to make my workouts a waste or a wash.  I just need to really find that focus again.  Tonight will be leg day, so I won't be angry at least. LOL  Just gotta keep myself in check and get there!!  

***A very happy birthday to my sister today!!  I can't believe she's 25 :( :( :( How the heck does that happen?!  I remember holding her as a baby... being annoyed that she always wanted to be around me (lol).... talking to her like she was my kid.... Love her so much!!  Mary, you're all grown up and doing great things!  Proud of you and everything you do...all that you've become.***

Friday will be fun.... interesting... and hopefully dry.  Claire and I will be spending the night inside the ZOO.  We'll be there with girl scouts and sleeping with the hippos!  I'm glad that it's looking like it won't be too hot - just hoping at least the thunderstorms hold off.  It's going to be fun though. We'll get to see some behind the scenes stuff...learn more about the animals and camp out.  I remember wanting to be a zoologist when I grew up. Claire talks about that too - and I can totally see her working with animals when she grows up.  

Well, I will leave things at that for now.  Just hoping I can get my butt back on track - all the way - and do hard things..  side note: seriously, when did I become the person I am who wants to smack the heck out of Autumn and all her motivational ramblings.... LOL I think to me she just sounds so fake to me.  I think if I actually believed her, it wouldn't be so bad, but now whenever someone says "You can do hard things" I think of her and it just screams BS.  But the program is good - so I'll keep at it. And I know the people in my life mean well and mean it when they say stuff like that, so I'll try to just start believing in myself a little.  

I need to get myself back to who I was 4 weeks ago.  I feel like a different person... and not in a good way.  I was so focused and and motivated.  Felt like I was being an inspirational person.  Now I just feel like the old Katie who wants to cuddle up on the couch with a bag of bugles, binge watch some netflix and take a nap!  <--- Okay, even focused/motivated Katie wanted to do that.  But right now I reaaaalllllllly want to. But this is real life.  This isn't a TV show where all you see is the good.  This is truth. There are highs and there are lows.  It's not all sweat and smiles.  Sometimes it's tears, cuss words and persistence.  It's about balance and finding what it takes to persevere.  If you're looking for motivation....let's do it together. Let's keep going. One step at a time.  I know that I not only stumble, but fall clear off the damn path sometimes.  But I keep getting back up.  Do I cry about it?  Yes... probably more than I should... but you just get back up and try again.  They say if Plan A doesn't work, there's 25 other letters in the alphabet to try...  I've probably still used up all of them and am on to Plan CC by now or something... But it's all good.  Here's to a good rest of the month.

xoxo

Katie