The Struggle is Part of the Story

I'm not sure what happened, but I am having a rough time...having trouble being motivated...pushing through and getting it done.  I want to look good - to feel good - but I am back to the point of struggling. I get to this point every time.  In the past, though, I haven't done so well beforehand.  Starting the 80 Day Obsession, Phase 1 was amazing. We did SO WELL! We got every workout in. I was doing drumming too.  I meal prepped and stuck to it!  Phase 2 started, and things started going south.  We missed a handful of workouts, I lost my ooomph... And now we're supposed to be well into Phase 3... today is Day 63 I believe.  Last week we only worked out twice.  We made up exercises from Phase 2 that we had missed.  I'll have to check my calendar at home, but I think we still have about 4 workouts from phase 2 to make up....plus the stuff from Phase 3 that we've missed (we have done some of it!).  It's just discouraging.  I think This is where I start feeling like a failure. 

And before you jump on me and tell me how amazing I am - I know that I've done well.  I know that I was still down 10 lbs from starting this yesterday when I weighed.  I know that "I can do hard things." But I should be further. I should be able to have more will-power to make good choices.  I'm just discouraged and disappointed in myself.  And it's okay.  

I just need to use this struggle to push me to get back on track and finish this with a bang.  

We've got 17 more days left of the 80 Day Obsession.  I need to take time today to read some motivational stories and look at some inspiring before and afters.  I need to remind myself that I can be that person.  So, I've got the meal plan in order for this week - just going to do my best to not slip up at work.  

I share my struggles because I know other people struggle too.  I don't want anyone to feel like they are the only one.   I share my insecurities to put things in perspective.  No, I do not find myself as attractive as other people I know...but I know that's the case for most people.  I fall. I get back up.  I cry but I wipe away the tears.  I lose my motivation, but I will fake it til I make it.  Do I want to work out tonight?  Nope.  Honestly I have no desire to... and I apologize to my husband who has to put up with me through that.  I do not feel like a strong person.  No matter how much someone tells me I am - I don't feel that inside.  I feel weak. I sense that tonight will be emotional.  But I will just have to power through it.  

I'll  keep you all posted as to how the week goes.  Gonna do my best to make it a great one.  

xoxo

Katie